As a young mother and program participant in Building Futures with The Road Home, Sara knows that there are more components to hospitality than just being provided a roof over your head. Having experienced an array of discomforts in the past that have complicated living with young children – ranging from having properties consistently patrolled by police, experiencing unsafe personal situations due to domestic violence, or having neighbors who are unfriendly to her family – she has continuously received the same message from many different platforms: you are not welcome here.
One such example that Sara recalls is when her former landlord had instructed her to put her children’s bedrooms on opposite ends of her apartment since neighbors would complain about the noise. But Sara wasn’t sure how to prevent this from happening – to her, her children were just children. Sara also heard this message from parents in her community with whom she wanted her son to bond – parents who, according to them, did not want her son’s “bad behaviors” to rub off on their children. It had become so difficult for her family to adjust to the community when she was constantly moving and facing the judgment that came with it.
“I feel like a lot of times people assume it’s your fault, or you’re ‘on something’ if you don’t have housing,” she explained. “A lot of times there’s this false judgment.”
Eventually, Sara was able to find a townhouse for her family. She enjoyed the space it provided her family physically – but sadly, her family remained in danger as they then experienced a domestic violence situation. From there, she fled with her family to a hotel before moving to a shelter and receiving supportive services from Domestic Abuse Intervention Services (DAIS). She stayed at their shelter for three months, even though her apartment was still in her name. For safety reasons, she chose not to renew her lease, hoping for a new opportunity for her and her family.
At the shelter, Sara was able to fill out her homelessness paperwork and qualify for the Building Futures program. She says her case managers from both DAIS and The Road Home worked to make her transition as smooth as possible into her new program. “And then from there, Allie was very helpful,” she says, describing her case manager at The Road Home, “she was able to, like, help me with getting the kids’ birth certificates. So that was really nice to do that. And just helped me apply for places by taking me to new apartments and getting applications and we would meet at the libraries and stuff.”
Through The Road Home, Sara was able to find what she assumed was a safe place to live. In what she describes as an unfortunate “small world” situation, Sara soon found out that she and her children’s abuser were already living in the same building. She and Allie both acted fast and were able to help her use the Violence Against Women Act to move quickly into another new apartment, finally having the safety her family needed and deserved.
Sara is an example of what happens when a young mother takes her own advice: be strong, persevere, and communicate – but also of how a family can flourish when they experience true hospitality. “Having the right location contributes to you feeling secure,” Sara says, noting that distance to quality and affordable grocery stores and places for her children to play safely contribute to her family’s well-being and sense of belonging in a community. With the resources now available to help her achieve her goals – potentially including homeownership – Sara has a future full of promise for her and her kids.
As for advice she has for other people experiencing homelessness? “Stay strong”, Sara says. “Stay on top of applications, and stay in contact with people when you are trying to find housing,” she recommends. “It takes time for sure.” Patience is a virtue when seeking stable housing – but even more crucial is that Sara and others in similar situations hear this message: “You are welcome here!”